Something about Agreeableness from the Class before New Year

I did not expect that Blogger cannot be logged in mainland. I had planned to write something about our last class before the lunar calendar new year. But I could just save it for later when I realized this block.

Anyway, it is great that I can open this B now and recall what had inspired me a lot during that class.

I remember one sentence given by Udani, "Be agreeable when you disgree with others." Upon hearing that, I thought, "When I diagree with others, how can I still be agreeable?"



Later I wikied the word"agreeableness" and got:

"Agreeableness is one of the five major dimensions of personality structure, reflecting individual differences in concern for cooperation and social harmony. People who score high on this dimension are empathetic, considerate, friendly, generous, and helpful."
"A central feature of agreeableness is its positive association with altruism and helping behavior."

That did help me understand Udani's words better. Even if you disagree with other, which can happen now and then in our lives, you should still show respects to the perspectives and needs of others and be friendly.

You should not become dicruptive and agressive and even lose your temper just because other people hold different views from yours. Instead, if you can use more constructive tactics and try to give ground to others, you may gain more acceptance by your peers. And that acceptance means an asset in many socail situations, does'n it?

That is my understanding of agreeableness. I don't know whether this is all agreeableness and Udani's words about. If someone read this post and have something to add or have different opinions, comments welcome!

As for my scroe in agreeableness, I personally rank myself the average. If someone comes to me for aid, I will alwayse consent and try my best to help. But I do not often initiate providng help. That it what I have to improve later in my life in order to become more agreeable. I need to start practice being more sensitive to other people's needs.

Hope someday I can gain more points in agreeableness!

My AMAZING Retreat at Macau Tower!!

It is really great to have this semester's leadership journey started with this fantastic retreat!

I headed for Macau Tower this morning, just expecting that we are going to have sky walk today, but came back with lots of unexpected gains.

Before the sky walk, we had some warm-up games, and to me, also some buffers.

In one of them, we were groupe and asked to build a tower with a stack of newspapers. Our gruop ended ranking the third, even though we thought ours was the most "good looking". Haha.. Later, I thought we could have done better if we had more planning and distribution of tasks instead of setting out right away due to the time limit. Actually We started with everyone making tubes, without using the tubes to build the tower. So we did not know whether the tubes are enough or not and actually how the tower should be buile. The result was that when we built the tower in the last minute, the tower could not stand. If we had someone make tubes and someone think about the structure and build the tower with the tubes already made, we could have time to revise the structure to make it stand. Even though there was a time limit, planing and distribution of tasks could facilitate work and make advantages of cooperation. That is a lesson for future group work.

After that, there came the main dish: sky walk. Actually I was quite scared. At the beginning, I could move only very slowly and in very short steps. And I did not dare to look down, because I tried once and I found that my heart beat faster and my legs feel like jelly. When I was asked to wear the blinder, I became even afraid. I kept my hand on the shoulder of the person ahead and trid to feel the voices around me. I comforted myself and started to chat with others. When I heard James sing, I laughed and felt better and more relaxed. After I took of the blinder, I surprisingly found that I was not that afraid anymore.
I began to look down and saw the cars parked on the ground, the buildings, and the boats. Quite interesiting! They were all just like my toys. When I looked straight down, my heartbeat accelerated again, but this time I forced myself to keep looking for longer time and...I felt better! I found myself even enjoy this fear and thrill. Later, I even stood at the very edge, stretched my hands to reach out and troted on the outer rim. I had encountered the fear and thus enjoyed the excitment and the unique and wonderful views. I will tell myself to have a try when I meet something afraid of in the future, because I have once walked 233 meters above the ground!!

After the wonderful lunch in the revolving restaurant, we went for the wall-climbing. I did not volunteer to have a try because I was still not that confident about my sports genes and I was afraid that I would waste the valualbe chance of our group. I thought the chances should be given to someone more capable at climbing so that we can win more points as a group. But later I felt somewhat regretful. I thought that even though I was not good at sports, how could I be certain that I could not do climbing well. People who are not good at sports may also climb well! Anyway I lost the chance to have a try and see how far I can go. However, though I was not the one who tried and received the encouragements, I was the one who constantly gave encouragements and cheers to all the climbers. I think it was also very impotant to our group's performance. Vicky said, "When I heard people cheering at me on the ground, I felt more fighting will and thougth that I had to ring the bell!" In a gruop, there will often be some people who shine and some people who work behind the scenes and help others to shine. You cannot alwayse be the one shining and you need to learn to help and support others to shine so as to achieve the group's overall maximized outcome.

I would like to say something about Steve, even though he was not the one ringing the bell. Actually he did not even climb, but he kept giving instructions in a very loud voice to all climbers. When Udani asked, "who want to climb in your group?" He stood out. But when Udani asked again, "Because of time limit, we cannot have so many climbers now. Among you, who really want to have a try?", he steped back, giving opportunities to others and continue to instruct other climbers. That did move me a lot.

Ivy, who was the first one to ring the bell, said, "Actually I wanted to give up after I climbed to the third ring as I thought it was good enough and I was tired out. But when I saw the bell right there and the victory just ahead of me, I decided to go for it." I had the same experience in the life. When I have run out of energy, but perceived that the success was within my reach, I will be caused to bring out the best in me.

James fell three times and trid three times. Even though he did not climb that well, like what he said, " I am already tried my best", he's already won, because his will has been tested and this is what this sport means to ordinary climbers.


This retreat did enrich my life experiences. I will talk with many people these experiences, especially as part of leadership training, because I am not a tourist, nor a sportsman, but a leadership pursuer. When I first talked with my parents my experiences, thoughts, enjoyment and growth gained from today's retreat, they felt happy and proud. And I feel happy and proud as well when I can make them happy and proud.